Depression at its best

Sucking it up and trying to get over this depression!! Where's my ruby red slippers?!?!? I want to go back to the land that makes sense and that's full of friends! There's NO PLACE LIKE HOME! No amout of money can replace happiness. I may have said the life was not great there and with some ppl it wasn't. But for the majority, I LOVED MY LIFE IN IDAHO!

Ok, yep I know that things will be great in Alaska, but that does not help the fact that Rob and I are a little home sick and that the traditions that we usually follow at this holiday season can not even come close to doing. We both miss our friends and family. And you are right Nicky, the not being able to jump in a car and go see YOU or any friend of mine or Robs is a HUGE deal!! For him as well as me. Idk only time will tell what we will do, as for today I can remain sad and wish I was near my extended family! Rob when you read this post know I would follow you anywhere! You are my life and my world, but that will not change the fact that I will be home sick and depressed from time to time, and that I will dream of going home. I love you with all that I am and all that I have and that will never change!!! No matter where we live.

Im not going to sit here and say that i am happy and that everything is peachy!! its not!! I am sad, i am depressed. I really wish i could convince Rob to go home and to start his own mobile RV, Lets face it he had tons of customers and people who loved him in southern ID.  I know he could have done well. 

I guess I just dont understand why he Hates southern ID.....I have always thougth a place is as good as you make it. I know how dumb that sounds when I am complaining about AK. BUT BUT BUT,  I have good reason to complain.  

MY HUBBY IS NOT HAPPY HERE AND HE MISSES HIS FRIENDS AND HE MISSES JUST GOING OUT AND HUNTING AND SHOOTING WITH THE KIDS.. 

I can say that i miss that too.  I would be a huge lier if i said i didn't miss my friends.  I miss them so much. 

I miss school. I have no desire to go to school here.. there grants and loans are so hard to get and if i were a native then i would be able to get grants in no time. 

I want to scream and say "hay what about my dream of raising our kids and me going to school. and Him running his own business?"    Why must we be in search of the almighty dollar. I know Mark fired him for NO FREAKING GOOD REASON!!!! How ever lets move on and MOVE BACK. 

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Im so frustrated!!!!!      Oh yeah and goodie Rob has to either walk to work starting monday or ride his bike.... in the -6 deg weather.... it does not make me happy!!! I will have to walk to the store to get food.  I know I will have a great car in about 6 months. :(  maybe we should just pack it in and say we did the best we could and time to go home.